Working parents often travel out of town for a quite long time because of their works. This certainly can not be avoided just because you have a five year old child.

There is no significant difference about whether the mother or the father who will go. The most important thing to most children is the closest person they live with. If that figure leaves, the process of adaptation for children will be much more difficult and that required an intensive preparation.

Without preparation, it is clear that children can experience a sense of loss. This kind of feelings can affect their behavior such as fussy, difficult to eat, more temperamental, morose, and other. If this thing happened too often, the child’s feelings can be hurt and he might think that his parents don’t love him.

For the long-term impact, the child could only develop closeness with the person who fosters them at home and ignore the parents. If there is no previous agreement, the implementation of foster pattern is possible to change. For example, the matter of discipline can be freer.

Make preparation.

Hopefully these tips can minimize the impact of going out parents on children:
* Tell your son or daughter about your travel plan or schedule.

Ideally, let them know it in previous months. Tell them that this time you will be leaving for a quite long time, but emphasize that your partner will still be there to foster the children at home. Let your child know about the destination and length of your journey. Also emphasize that the reason you are leaving is for the sake of the family. This is not about whether the child knows what you are talking about but this is more about respecting and appreciating the child.

* Provide a sense of security
Explain that you will again come home and be together with him. If you are consistent of keeping your own words, it will be easier to give understanding to the child because he had learned that the father/mother, always keep the promise of the return on time.

*Foster pattern agreement
Make an agreement with your partner about the foster pattern that will be applied. With the commitment to make foster pattern (which is considered best for children), children’s education is expected to run well even if you are not at home.

*Replacement figures
You can bring a replacement figure while you are not home. If the mother leaves, you can call in the child’s grandma or auntie. On the other hand, the father can be temporary replaced by the child’s grandfather or uncle. The people you choose must not affect the bonding between you and the child by the time you come back.

* Involve in preparation
For example, take the children to buy warm clothes for you. Explain that the clothes will be used during the journey. The involvement of children and you, will build trust in themselves that someday the father will surely return.

* Keep in touch
While apart from home, keep in contact with the family, especially the little ones. Take advantage of technology such as e-mail, chat with webcam, or conventional technology such as telephone to maintain closeness with the child.
by Ricardo
(bedbathandbeyond) (bed bath and beyond)

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